I feel....


I feel the need to transform.  I feel like I am in a time of change, a moment of growth, but I feel frustrated, hurt, and angry because I am not sure what I am looking for.  I am not sure what I am missing.  I am not sure what I need to feel strong, brave, and secure.  I feel like my feet are glued to the ground but I need to fly, soar, find out who I really am.

It is a miserable feeling.  This feeling of not really knowing who I am.  I feel like I don't know who I am, or how to even figure that out.  I feel like my dreams have become hazy.  I dislike parts of myself.  I am insecure.  Oh, it is a miserable feeling.

I feel like inside of me is this stick.  Going right down the center of my body.  It is propping me up in a way.  Forcing me to stand tall, to act brave, to pretend I know who I am.  I feel like I need this stick to crack right in half so that I can explore, be free, set my wings out to fly, to find myself.  Yet I have no idea how to crack this stick.