On the first of January, I sat in my meditation corner and thought deeply about how I wanted to move through this year with intention. The end of 2018 felt like a whirlwind and I was ready to slow down. I was tired of rushing from one thing to the next. It was time to be purposeful and present in the moment.

Here we are a few days away from the beginning of May and I feel like a failure with my intentions. I haven’t slowed down. My days are full. My focus is scattered. I am not feeling great

As I sit here my shame game is going strong.

I feel terrible for letting myself down. I wanted to be present and yet I have found myself spending countless hours scrolling on my phone. I wanted to slow down and I find myself saying yes to many things that I really want to say no to. I had high hopes but terrible follow through.

Has this ever happened to you? Have you ever wanted to do something but didn’t take the action steps to accomplish it?

It can be so easy to say “well Jennifer, if you want to be more intentional stop wasting your time”

In fact, I have said that to myself many times. Those inner gremlins are strong and they know how to hit hard. They show up at the most inopportune times and remind me of what a failure I am.

But rather than allow them to knock me down I have chosen to step back and reflect on some of the things that have unfolded so far in 2019.

I jumped head first into unknown waters and navigated my way through the waves learning so much about a new business and forming new relationships.
I lost my last living Grandparent. I was one of the lucky ones who grew up with all four of my grandparents until late into my 20’s
I taught yoga classes
I spent time with my nieces and nephews who I adore
I traveled with family and filled my heart with laughter and incredible memories
I took a major leap towards a dream that has been living in my heart for a very long time {more to come about this, I can’t wait to share}
I hosted two rounds of the Love Notes Postcard Project
I connected deeper with my love
I lead a troop of Daisy Scouts through their first year of scouting

So much has already happened and there is still a lot ahead. Rather than bring myself down I am choosing to stand in the joy of knowing that I am the creator of my own story. I get to choose my next adventure.

And here’s the thing; you do too. You get to decide where you are going and how you are going to get there. The most fabulous thing is that you don’t have to have it all figured out. All you need to know is what your next step is.

For me, my next right step is showing up in my meditation corner and getting quiet. Lighting candles and pulling cards. This simple practice grounds me and brings me back.

What is your next right step? Share below in the comments so that I can support you and cheer you on.