following your intuition

following your intuition

The year was 2008.  I was living on my own in an adorable studio apartment.  This sacred space held my heart as I began an epic search to unearth who I was and what I stood for.  Like so many times in my life, I felt lost in this great big world. The eternal question “why am I here and what is my purpose?” played on repeat in my head.  

stronger together

stronger together

When the universe wants to teach you a lesson it doesn't give up until you learn it.  

I am an introvert.  I tend to observe rather than engage.  I take in all that is happening around me.  But when you only observe you stand on the outside and no one knows what is going on with you inside.  There are times I feel isolated and lonely.  There are times when I feel defeated and unsure.  

One of the ways that I connect is by showing up to this space and spilling open the contents of my heart.  It allows me the opportunity to share my story.  In sharing my story I hear from others who are going through something similar and it makes me feel less alone. 

All to often I feel like I need to do it on my own.  I do not like to ask for help and when others try to help I push them away.  I am a pleaser and want to do anything to make someone else comfortable.  I think of others needs before my own even when they are willing to help me.  When it comes to my work I feel like it all has to be done by me.  I bog myself down with trying to do it all.  But no one person can do everything.  

We are stronger when we come together.

This is the lesson the universe has been trying to teach me.  The lesson I have been pushing away time and time again.  But within these last few weeks I am learning that I can't do it all alone.  I need to reach out.  I need to invite others in.  

My sister in law showed me this by sharing a very personal story publicly.  In doing so she connected with other tender hearts who have gone through or is going through what she had.  In sharing her story she helped others to know that they are not alone and in turn she learned that when she felt isolated that there were others out there going through what she had.  

It is important to share our stories.  

It is our stories that invite others in.
It is our stories that connect us. 
It is our stories that bring us closer to one another.  
It is in telling our stories that we help our hearts heal. 

For the past couple of years I have been on a journey to eat more mindfully and move my body daily.  Karen and Katrina from Tone It Up have been my inspiration.  I want to have more energy, a clear mind, and feel strong. 

I have lingered on the outskirts of the Tone It Up Community.  I longed to find a couple of other girls from NJ who followed the plan but never took the effort to really seek them out, until now.  They just kicked off their next challenge and I actively pursed finding others from my area.  It has been such a blessing to know they are out there.  I never would have found them had I not sought them out.  Together we are going to go through this.  We will be there to support one another to hold each other accountable and let each other know it is ok when we slip up.  

We are stronger together.

The theme for this challenge is actually titled 'Stronger Together'.  That could not have been more appropriately titled.  The universe showing up again to try to teach me this lesson.  

When I was younger I was terrible at math.  I remember sitting for hours at the dining room table with my dad as he tried to explain it all to me.  It took a while but once I got it, I had it.  My mom always said she could see the moment the light bulb went off in my head and I understood what he was explaining. 

If my mom was here today I think this would be one of those moments she would see the light bulb going off.   I am FINALLY learning to invite others in.  To share my heart not only in the written word but through stories and conversations.  I crave and desire that face to face connection.  Being an introvert it can be hard to show up into that. 

Writing has given me the opportunity to pour my heart out and learn that when I did so I would not be rejected.  It is ok to share.  It is necessary to share. 

I have grown steady on these writing legs but it is time to spread my wings and dive in deeper.  Knowing that we are stronger together I feel deep courage and confidence inside my heart to keep stepping forward on this journey.  It is time to open up and let others see me in ways that I have not done so before.  

I invite you to join me on this journey.  To take these steps together.  To encourage one another.  To let each other know that they are not alone.  Will you join me?


the importance of community


I have learned that we aren't meant to travel this journey by ourselves.  When we come together we can do so much more than we ever can on our own.  

There is magic in community.  
There is magic in gathering.  
There is magic in opening up your heart and sharing it.  

I am an introvert.  When I step into a group I struggle.  I seek out the back of the room so I can quietly observe.  I soak it all in from a distance but always leave wishing I had gotten a little bit closer.  I long to dive in deep but struggle to do so.  

I have learned that I must step forward.  I do not need to wait for an invitation to find my way into the circle. I just need to drop my insecurities and step in.  It is not an easy thing to do, but it is so rewarding when I do it.  

It is connection that pushes me to dive a little bit deeper.  
It is connection that expands my horizon.  
It is connection that helps me grow.

But connection only happens when I let down my guard and step into the circle.  I have to be willing to not only listen, but to also share my own stories of heartbreak and triumph.  I have to not only reach out, but also reach in.  I have to be able to not only catch others stories but also be vulnerable enough to share my own.

gathering around a table

I learned how deeply I longed for connection when I attended my first art retreat.  Quite and shy I found a way to blend into the background, yet I left there broken open.  I knew that I could no longer live closed off.  I had to reach out and invite others in.  I had to show up to the table.  

I have found my most meaningful connections unearth when I am surrounded by people who have similar interest as I do.  It is in these spaces that it is easier to dive in deep and share my heart.  I feel a sense of trust and connection because we have that common bond between us.  

The vastness of the internet makes it easy for us to stay in touch, but there is still something beautiful and magical about gathering together in person.  Looking into each others eyes, reaching out and holding hands, being together in the same room.  This is a precious gift.

Being an introvert I can allow long amounts of time to pass by without reaching out to gather.  It feels like work sometimes to make the effort.  But once I am with my people it all feels right and I never regret stepping into the circle.  

This year I am committing to spending more time with others.  To stepping out of my comfort zone and inviting my kindred's in.  I want to break down the wall I have built up and connect deeply.  I know the only way this will manifest is if I show up and share pieces of my heart with others.  

So I invite you to gather with me.  To show up as you are and share a piece of your heart.  I promise to be sharing a piece of mine as well.  Let's spend an afternoon of creative connection together.  If this sounds even a little bit intriguing to you click below to sign up to receive the invitation.  I hope that you will join me.  It would be wonderful to meet face to face.